Red like Rose Quartz
by TalkingSalad12
Summary: Steven found the rumor of the song that plays on a mysterious channel on a full moon at midnight. He listens and it plays the song of his soul. One-shot


**This takes place before Steven found out Rose was Pink Diamond**

Red like Rose Quartz

Steven sat on his bed scrolling on the laptop, Connie let him borrow. Steven wasn't really looking for anything, just scrolling along. He couldn't help but glance at the portrait of his mother, before looking away.

_MY Diamond, YOUR Diamond, PINK DIAMOND!_

_I watched the leader of the Crystal gems, shatter, Pink Diamond._

Steven couldn't help but clutch his hand into a fist. His mother shattered a gem, that was the same as killing them. It made Steven feel sick. Garnet assured him that she had no choice, so why didn't it make him feel better? Garnet said when you fight, others get hurt, even if its for a good cause.

Not long ago, Steven wanted to be a crystal gem warrior so bad. Defeating monsters, saving the world, protecting humanity. Then he learned those monsters used to be gems, then the homeworld gems came and he fought them. It was supposed to be cool, but the way they showed hatred towards his mother, their devotion and love to the Diamonds. They weren't evil monsters, just gems who followed the orders of their rulers.

It wasn't as if Steven was oblivious to both sides. Blue Diamond wanted to shatter Ruby for fusing with Sapphire, when she was just protecting her. Peridot looked down on Pearl when she first came, treated her horribly because Pearl's were servants. When Jasper got corrupted, Steven tried to help, but she attacked him for it. Homeworld was clearly wrong on so many things and wouldn't listen. That didn't make it easier.

Steven didn't want to hurt anyone. If anyone got hurt, it hurt him too. He rolled on his back and looked at the ceiling. Did his mom ever feel like that? Steven didn't know, he only knew her from the photos, stories, and the video. The video she filmed with his dad.

_I won't be gone, I'll become half of you. And every second you spend loving yourself, that's me, loving you and loving being you!_

In times when he was down, he'd re-watch that tape at night. His mother radiating love and kindness. Steven still found it so hard to believe, she'd shatter someone. How someone capable of killing could be so kind.

He closed his eyes, he wished he could talk to her. The real her, not a cloud that imitates her personality. He wished, they both could have existed. Then he'd have his mom, and the gems would have the leader they needed.

The gems, they were closest thing he had to mothers. Pearl was protective, Amethyst was fun, Garnet was a -heh- fusion of the two. They loved him, and he loved them. He did everything he could to make them happy, he knew they were happy with him, but they still missed his mom. Steven knew they would never admit, to him or themselves, but he was the reason Rose was gone. She was gone and the only thing that could replace her, was him, and he couldn't measure up. He couldn't be their leader, he couldn't fix everything or make everything better like his mom. The gems loved him, but he couldn't replace his mother, and he never would.

Steven rolled back onto his stomach and started to surf the web. At some point he went to Ronaldo's blog, Keep Beach City Weird. He stopped talking about snake people. Somehow, he got a picture of Blue Diamond's ship. Then Steven noticed something small, in the comment section, the one who posted it just had guest, but it had a funny comment.

_Hey Ronaldo, did you know if you tune the radio station 77.7 at midnight on a full moon; it will play you a song that reflects your soul. The song could come from our world, even it could come from another world, another reality._

"Full moon?" Connie got him a calendar that showed the moon phases as well as the date, and wouldn't you know it there was a full moon that night. Steven looked over to his Cookie Cat radio clock and turned it on to that station. Static just filled the air waves. He frowned and turned it off. Then he remembered the description, full moon and at midnight. Steven didn't even think about it. He loved music, and if there was a magic radio station that sang his soul, he wanted to hear it.

"Hmm…" That would mean Steven would have to stay up till midnight. He was never good at staying up, but he would try.

He fell asleep at 11:00. He would have slept through it if lion hadn't woken him up.

"Thanks Lion," Steven yawned as he looked at the clock. 11:59. Steven quickly grabbed the clock and turned it on just as it struck midnight… Just more static. Steven sighed, he was hoping for something exciting. He reached to turn it off so he could go back to sleep, when…

**Red Like Roses part 2**

Steven was so shocked he fumbled the radio in his hands for a second before getting a better grip on it. Who just said that where did the static go? Then he almost dropped his radio again when an electric guitar blasted through the speakers.

_I couldn't take it, couldn't stand another minute_

_Couldn't bare another day without you in it_

_All of the joy that I had known for all my life_

_Was stripped away from me the minute that you died!_

It was definitely rock and roll. Steven loved all music, but he wished he knew what the music was before having his radio turned up so high. He quickly turned the volume down before he continued listening.

_To have you in my life was all I ever wanted_

_But now without you I'm a soul forever haunted._

_Can't help but feel that I had taken you for granted _

_No way in hell that I can ever comprehend this!_

The music was loud and boomy, but the lyrics sounded sad.

_I wasn't dreaming when they told me you were gone_

_I was wide awake and feeling that they had to be wrong_

_How could you leave me when you'd swore that you would stay?_

_Now I'm trapped inside a nightmare every single F'ing day_

Steven didn't know how he knew, but he did. The singer was talking about her mom. She did know her but she died and she was sad. Steven couldn't help but remember the first time he asked his dad where his mom was. When Steven was little he noticed the other kids in the city had a mom, not a Garnet, or a Pearl, or an Amethyst. When Steven asked his dad, and he told him, she was gone, Steven couldn't help but feel cheated.

_It's like a movie but there's not a happy ending_

_Every scene fades black and there's no pretending_

_This little fairy tale doesn't seem to end well_

_There's no knight in shining armor to awake me from this spell_

_I know you didn't plan this_

_You tried to do what's right_

_But in the middle of this madness_

_I'm the one_

_(I'm the one)_

_(I'm the one)_

_You left to win this fight_

That last part made Steven think about what he said in the room. Rose tried to do what was right, but now because of what she did, the only person who can end what she started was Steven.

_Red like Roses~_

_Fills my head with dreams and finds me_

_Always closer _

_To the emptiness and sadness that has come to take the place of you_

Once again, Steven thought of the gems. How they missed her, how sad they were without her, how he was the reason she was gone.

_I know you're broken down by anger and by sadness_

_You feel I left you in a world that's full of madness_

Steven perked at the new singer.

_Wish I could talk to you if only for a minute_

_Make you understand the reason why I did it_

Was this the first singer's mom, singing… As a ghost? All Steven could do was listen in astonishment.

_I wanna tell you that you're all that ever mattered_

_Want you to know that for eternity I'm shattered_

_I tried so hard to protect you, but I failed to _

_And in a prison of abandonment I jailed you_

_I never planned that I would leave you there alone _

_I was sure that I would see you when I made it back home_

_And all the times I swore that it would be okay_

_Now I'm nothing but a liar and you're thrown into the fray_

_This bed time story ends with misery ever after_

_The pages are torn and there's no final chapter_

_I didn't have a choice I did what I had to do_

_I made a sacrifice but forced a bigger sacrifice on you_

_I know you lived a nightmare_

_I caused you so much pain_

_But baby please don't do what I did_

_I don't want_

_(I don't want)_

_(I don't want)_

_You to waste your life in vain_

Hearing pain and fear in the second singer, made him think of his mom. She swore everything would be okay, but it turned into a lie. She made a sacrifice, but forced a harder choice on her kid. And she was begging her kid, to not repeat her mistake, and make that sacrifice in vain. Not giving her life for Steven, but shattering Pink Diamond.

_Red like Roses~_

_Fills my head with dreams and finds me_

_Always closer _

_To the emptiness and sadness that has come to take the place of you_

_You were not the only one who needed me I thought you understood_

_You were the one I needed and you left me as I always feared you would_

_Would I change it if I could?_

_It doesn't matter how, the petals scatter now_

Steven imagined Pink Diamond's shards, scattering, like rose petals. Her mother holding her sword, tears running down her face. Maybe if she could change it, she would have.

_Every nightmare just discloses_

_It's your blood that's red like roses_

_And no matter what I do nothing ever takes the place of you!_

When the guitar solo played Steven got lost in thought. How did Pink Diamond affect his mom? How did the war affect her? Trying to save a planet no one seemed to even like. Getting friends who got shattered or corrupted. It must had been difficult, especially since it went on for a thousand years. A human couldn't handle that for ten years. Did his mom get so tired of her friends dying, that she thought she had no choice? So, she shattered Pink Diamond, so no one else would have to. Garnet did say she always did what was best for Earth. Rose, wasn't perfect, but the gems loved her regardless, and no matter Steven did, it didn't take the place of her

_Red like Roses~_

_Fills my head with dreams and finds me_

_Always closer _

_To the emptiness and sadness that has come to take the place of you!_

The song finished, and static took its place. Steven turned off his radio, put it away and laid down. He stared at the ceiling, the song was fast and rock and rolly, but it was also sad. It was about a mother and daughter having a conversation. Actually it sounded like a fight. The daughter was angry with her mother for leaving, dying. That wasn't fair was it. She didn't know her daughter would be forced to take up a heavy burden. Steven closed his eyes and finally admitted something he tried to ignore.

"Mom, didn't mean to leave us like this."

Despite what everyone thought, Rose wasn't perfect. She had thoughts and feelings. She felt fear and regret. And even she made bad choices when she was trying to do the right thing. And maybe Steven shouldn't be so angry about what happened to Pink Diamond. His mother was in a desperate situation, and as much as Steven wished otherwise, there were times you'd have to make… really hard decisions. He didn't know why, but listening to that angry and sad song, made him feel a little better.

As he laid there, he wondered if his dad would like that song. It even had his mom's name in the title, but she wasn't red she was pink. Wait, wasn't Pink a shade of red? Oh well, he would ask Pearl. He closed his eyes, curled up under the blankets and went to sleep, he would also look up that song tomorrow.

**I love music, I love RWBY, and I love Steven Universe**

**There's no doubt in my mind, Rose is proud of her son**


End file.
